Quotes by Christopher Dines, The Kindness Habit: Transforming our Relationship to Addictive Behaviours

“When we practise self-compassion, we look after ourselves just as though we are nurturing a small child. In fact, a major part of grieving our original pain work (so that we can heal and be emotion...”

“Lets remind ourselves that to be compassionate and forgiving doesnt mean we are endorsing dysfunctional behaviour. On the contrary, its essential the harm that was inflicted upon us is properly val...”

“No one can control their results. We can, however, control our attitude. When we practise compassion, it is most effective when it is unconditional and free from seeking an outcome compassion is a...”

“In my view, compassion takes empathy to another level. With compassion, there is an internal calling to move empathy into action. Compassion is love in action.”

“The process of recovering from addictiveness happens at a deeper level of consciousness and through feeling our pain without using old addictive fixes. There is no escaping that getting in touch wi...”

“To stay true to ourselves and remain kind to others is an art. It does require daily vigilance and, at the same time, its important to remember that art can often get messy.”

“Hitting bottom is an inside job it's something that happens within our consciousness.”

“Body scan meditation is mentally scanning through each part of the body with presence. It helps us be one with the body. Thus, we can feel if we are holding on to any tension or heaviness or any st...”

“When we observe the flow of our breathing, we transcend our thoughts and are able to bring mind and body into harmony with each other. Thus, we create calm.”

“Think of an untreated sex addict who spends hours every night until the early hours watching pornography on the internet instead of spending that time with their wife or husband, and then becomes s...”

“Its important to be aware that many families are dysfunctional, but we can change the patterns. Even if a child grew up in an aggressive or addictive household, they can heal and move past that wit...”

“Mental stories can literally spoil a human life. It took me a long time to become aware of my mental commentary, such as: Everything always goes wrong, I wont be accepted, Im a failure or Whats the...”

“In the addiction recovery community, we recognise that addicts can starve themselves of receiving social, sexual or emotional nourishment. Sex and love addicts starve themselves of a healthy, perso...”

“When we seek to escape from inner conflict and pain, we are running away from unresolved childhood trauma or original pain. Most people with serious addictive natures who are in the process of reco...”

“Top lines to a human being who tends to isolate (an avoidant) would mean they make an effort to talk to another human being when the opportunity arises. A top line can also mean that, whether we fe...”

“Bottom lines are addictive behaviours that we make a conscious choice not to repeat. For example, a recovering cocaine addict would create a bottom line that they will not use a mind- or mood-alter...”

“I dont think Ive ever met an addict in long-term recovery who hasnt gone through at least one traumatic childhood experience. Research indicates that one traumatic event in childhood is as grave as...”

“Tragically, because many addicts are not given sufficient love, nurturing and non-shaming dialogue at crucial stages in their early emotional development, they are on a quest to find contentment fr...”

“Some addicts do not even have basic parenting and instead are beaten, sexually abused, left to be looked after by a dysfunctional carer, put in orphan homes or rejected by their community. If you c...”

“Regardless of the different stages in our human development, unless we learn how to create loving and fulfilling relationships (with ourselves and others), addiction will follow not necessarily as...”