“Love is an optical illusion that makes you believe the object of your affection is the most beautiful person in the world.”

“I wouldn't even dare read the Torah, let alone attempt a witty observation on the Torah.”

“I'm an angel. The horns are only there to hold up the halo.”

“Childhood friends are continuity, uninterrupted connections between selves, and you hold on them. You hold on them and you love them, but sometimes they're not quite comfortable.”