“Tracy Morgan is subdued. I'm cool. I'm chilled out.”

“I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets.”

“Cool is the enemy of funny. You can't be cool and be funny at the same time. Only Eddie Murphy could do that.”

“People live too much of their lives on email or the Internet or text messages these days. We're losing all of our communication skills.”

“You can't hold me to the same standard as the president or a school teacher. I'm just a comedian. My job is like Archie Bunker.”

“On 'Saturday Night Live,' I never really wrote. You know, I would just - I would let the writers cast me into the show. So my strength - and I put all my energies into performance. I just couldn't ...”

“The cause of every anomaly can be found in woman.”

“Perhaps that was a thing about attractive women: A rejection demanded their respect, made them trust you more.”

“I think Im very blessed to have been raised by so many intelligent and impressive women, and now continuing that on a professional level, having people like Sarah and Nadia to guide me through this...”

“I love you butdon't know what todo.”

“It's like I'm reading a book, andit's a book I deeply love, but I'mreading it slowly now so the wordsare really far apart and the spacesbetween the words are almostinfinite. I can still feel you an...”

“The past is just a story we tell ourselves.”

“I did it,... I talked to Stephen King in a dream... not once but twice in two dreams. - As far from here I can tell you it's awesome... I did it... I jerkoff on a dream... dreaming that I'm jerking...”

“What type of wrong thing, did I do?...What wrong did I said... and why I am so unlucky with the questionable "Relationships"?”

“Just smile.You'll be glad that you did.”