Gender isnt simply some faucet that we can turn on and off in order to appease other people, whether they be heterosexist bigots or queerer-than-thou hipsters. How about this: Lets stop pretending that we have all the answers, because when it comes to gender, none of us is fucking omniscient.Instead of trying to fictionalize gender, lets talk about the moments in life when gender feels all too real. Because gender doesnt feel like drag when youre a young trans child begging your parents not to cut your hair or not to force you to wear that dress. And gender doesnt feel like a performance when, for the first time in your life, you feel safe and empowered enough to express yourself in ways that resonate with you, rather than remaining closeted for the benefit of others. And gender doesnt feel like a construct when you finally find that special person whose body, personality, identity, and energy feels like a perfect fit with yours. Lets stop trying to deconstruct gender into nonexistence, and instead start celebrating it as inexplicable, varied, profound, and intricate.

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About Julia Serano, Gender Outlaws: The Next Generation

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