“When shame is met with compassion and not received as conrmation of our guilt, we can begin to see how slant a lens it has had us looking through. That awareness lets us step back far enough to see...”

“Power is confusing for us, perhaps even terrifying, because our relationship with it had an unfortunate beginning. Someone in a position of power over us used and abused usIt seems as if power were...”

“When we first begin to take power more directly, after long having kept our relationship to it underground...it is natural that we experience anxiety, even guilt, at putting ourselves first. These ...”

“For change to occur in us, we must be willing to enter the wilderness of the unknown and to wander in unfamiliar territory, directionless and often in the darkness....We do not need to keep every l...”

“In the grief that comes with recognizing what happened to us, we often feel there is nowhere to turn for solaceWe do things to keep it away, such as becoming overly busy or using drugs or alcohol t...”

“As we move away from the old role in which we were helplessly entrapped as a victim, we make friends with the people who affirm us. Their enthusiasm about us mirrors the positive experience we are ...”

“Stop looking for that person you were in the past. She has changed. Look for the person she has grown into. She is wiser and stronger than than ever before. Don't go back to who you were. Cherish w...”

“Closeness was the promise of suffering and pain”

“In spite of the horror, in spite of the tragedy, in spite of the weeks of sleepless nights, I'm finally alive. I'm not pretending. I feel real. I'm not playing charades anymore. I wouldn't go back ...”

“I have to find a place to hideAn island in the seaSurrounded by a racing tideWhere I can live with me”

“He pulled my skirt up. I began to worry. Everyone knew he had broken in girls before and I didn't want it to happen to me. I said, 'No. Get off, please.' He pulled me down the alley and pushed me t...”

“Since most sexual abuse begins well before puberty, preventive education, if it is to have any effect at all, should begin early in grade school.”

“When someone forces you - he unkindly borrows- he does not, can not own you- Remember your body, spirit and heart are yours and only yours, and when you start to process your sexual abuse you will ...”

“Girls are genius at getting through sexual abuse. Often the only way to get through is not to feel. And that is exactly what these fantasy worlds allow: They give girls a place to go so they don't ...”

“The fact is, rape is utterly commonplace in all our cultures. It is part of the fabric of everyday life, yet we all act as if its something shocking and extraordinary whenever it hits the headlines...”